I’ve always been conservative and anti-big-government, but I must admit there have been times that I’ve thought and even said outloud, “I want a bailout for me!” or “Real Estate agents should get a piece of the bailout pie” or even worse, “Show me the money, Honey – er umm…I mean (almost)* President Elect Obama!”

Two years ago, I was down to $32.72 in my bank account. I decided there wasn’t anything to do, but go to the government for assistance. I cried all the way to the office. Why do they always put these places in such bad parts of town? As I looked at my surroundings, my sadness enveloped me. There were people lying on sidewalks, congregating at the corners, just hangin’ out, and looking very defeated. Suddenly I saw a vision of people trapped by the system that was supposed to help them. “Was I going to get trapped?”
Being unaware of how “the system” works, I was disappointed to find out that I would have to wait in line for an hour, only to be handed a piece of paper, and told to fill it out, and mail it back. What? How’s that going to help? A week later I had my phone interview to get government aid. The interview filled me with grief. I was told they would send me my acceptance letter with further information. The acceptance letter apparently got lost in the mail. But what did arrive, was help from people at our church, and within our community. The help from family and friends got me through while I built my real estate business.
The road has been rough. Two years have passed, and again, I’m faced with the same dilemma, do I go to the government for help? People tell me, “That’s why it’s there, to help people like you.” They say, “It’s just for a little while, to get you through.”

There is such inner turmoil. But what I want to do, is stand up and shout. NO! As for me, and my house…..
Am I just being stubborn? I don’t think it’s pride that I don’t want the government to bail me out. But maybe it is? Maybe I want to know that my kids are proud of me for taking them out of the bad situation, whatever may come.

Last night as I was thinking about what to do next, an internet acquaintance asked if she could send me a little money via paypal. She then sent me a link to a blog post she wrote, asking people to help me. Then there were the people who wanted to make sure my kids could go to the movie on Thanksgiving – like we’ve done for the last three years. There was even enough left for a treat for everyone.

I think….I’d rather count on God than the Government. Jehovah Jireh cares for me. I’m pretty sure “the govenment” doesn’t.

For people who would like to help us during this difficult time, please go