Kids Say/Do the Darndest Things

I get so much of my inspiration for these posts via my facebook friends. Today’s inspiration came from a friend in Iowa whose son swallowed a skeleton key. The key was 2 1/2 inches long. She posted the xray and then the real key. Oh my goodness!

Much like sharing our birth stories, we also like to share stories of the goofy (and sometimes frightening) things our children have done.

Share your stories in the comments.

Mommy Inventions

Change – I thrive on it. I’m constantly coming up with new uses for my time. Maybe I should now become an affiliate marketer I might ask myself. Then I will get the books and decide. Usually I drop the idea in the middle of research. But sometimes the idea will go even further (like Ta-Dah Mom – which I continue to promote).

Another thing my brain seems to do is actively invent new products. Oh, if I only had the resources to research all of my ideas! I may have figured out that what I really love is the research and not necessarily seeing the fruition of my idea. No, what I really love is telling someone my idea then having them tell me it’s “brilliant and you should do it!” That’s all I’m after, the words proclaiming how smart I am. (Now if that isn’t egotistical I don’t know what is – but I’m just being real here)

I would venture to say that on an average day I will use the phrase, “I have an idea” at least five times. Most of my ideas are ways to make the life of a mom just a little bit easier. With eight kids, I’ve had a lot of opportunity to make my life easier. 🙂

One of my ideas is a Night Owl Alarm Clock. It would be set at a certain time which would tell the child, “time to brush your teeth and put on your jammies.” Then 15 minutes later, it would chime again letting them know they are to get their FINAL drink of water. In five minutes another alarm would signal the child to get into bed. One more alarm (you set the time) would tell the child to put down the book and turn out the lights.  Isn’t it brilliant? Want to invest? 🙂

I’m always striving to solve problems. Case in point – The other day while visiting my mom in MO there was another visitor in the house. Little Xavier’s mom was in the hospital having a baby. She had to stay over an extra day so Xavier was staying with his Grandma (who my mom lives with). His Grandma gave Xavier a bath, but as she was getting him ready realized there were no longer any diapers in his suitcase.  It would be an hour before anyone could bring her diapers. Grandma got a little flustered with Xavier being “half neked.” I happened to look over and saw a Wal Mart bag. That’s when the idea took shape. We could put his legs through the bottom of the bag then take the loops and put his arms through the loops. Everyone laughed at my idea. I thought it was brilliant. His Grandma said, “There is no way he’ll let me put this on him.” She sat Xavier on her lap and proceed to slide his legs into the bag. The loops went over his arms, but kept falling down. I recommended a twist tie. We tied the loops behind him and he was able to go play without constantly being aware he was “half neked” and with Grandma not worrying about him having an accident on the couch.

As soon as he had on the “diaper” someone in the kitchen said, “Oh my gosh! It’s a redneck diaper!”

So, here is my first fully functional invention – The Redneck Diaper!

Xavier modeling his redneck diaper


Humor in the Holidays

This just in from Des Moines, Iowa ….

This is a friend of a friend in Des Moines. She lives just off a busy street.

Well, there is good news and bad news about my
Christmas decorations this year Good news is that I truly
out did myself this year with my Christmas decorations.  The bad
news is that I had to take him down after 2 days. I had more people come
screaming up to my house than ever. Great stories. But two things made
me take it down. First, the cops advised me that it would cause traffic
accidents as they almost wrecked when they drove by. Second, a 55 year
old lady grabbed the 75 pound ladder almost killed herself putting it
against my house and didn’t realize it was fake until she climbed to the
top (she was not happy). By the way, she was one of many people who
attempted to do that. My yard couldn’t take it either. I have more than
a few tire tracks where people literally drove up my yard. Kind of feel like I
gave in to the  man by taking him down but my neighbor did confirm
to near miss accidents on the busy street next to my house. I think I
made him too real this time So it was fun while it lasted.  

christmas decorations gone bad

Ignite the Fire! Available Again!

Finally after many hours — and much typing (27,000 words in two days!) and then lots and lots of website tweaking. Ignite the Fire is finally ready for you to purchase! Yippee!  Woo Hoo!  Doin’ the Snoopy Dance!

You can get your copy at

 itf resized

Another great thing is that I’ve found all of my lost workshops! I’ve been able to transfer one of them into an mp3 file and I’m giving it away for FREE! It’s my most popular workshop, “Putting the Fun Into Home Education!” And you get it absolutely FREE!

While I was transfering it from a .wav file to an MP3 I listened to it. I had so much fun listening in and what a great reminder of all the fun things we had done. At the time of the recording David was out running my booth. He was 11. John was apparently in the audience. He was only 9. I could hear him turn and wave to the crowd and say, “Hi, I’m John.” How cute is that? Oh, that was another one of the workshops, but…he was still at that one. I will be completing the other four workshops and once I do that, I probably won’t be giving this one away for free anymore. So get it now!

I absolutely loved those younger years of homeschooling. I still love homeschooling actually. But now the kids are all so self-sufficient I’m not needed quite as much.

Just tonight I was telling someone I don’t even remember teaching Bryan to read. One day – he was just reading. And now he reads a lot! Today he came in my room to tell me he was on page 200 of a book, Brisingr, that he started last night. 

Erica told me she has written over 50,000 words in the past four months or so. Holy Schmoly! The cool thing about my conversation with Erica was that she was bragging on her siblings and their gifts and talents. She asked me if I had seen the picture of the English Wolfhound that Briana had drawn. I had seen it. Erica said, “She could make money selling her drawings!” I’ve actually thought of that. I thought she could make notecards for animal lovers and sell them. But she likes to keep her drawings to herself (and the family).

Erica said to me, “You know, I think the reason we are all passionate about things is because you gave us time to do the stuff we really love doing.” Wow! What a kid!

Creative Way to Give Money as a Gift

As my kids have gotten older, they would rather I give them money instead of gifts for their birthday. I am not thrilled with the idea of just giving an envelope with cash —BO-RING!

For Briana’s 15th birthday this is what I did — She likes to watch the game show, Deal or No Deal, so I decided to recreate the game to give her money for her birthday.